Tag Archives: grace

Following in Faith, Why?

Profoundly Appropriate

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There is no question I am profoundly blessed. I do not take my life, circumstances, heartaches, pain, joy, blessings, relationships, daily living for granted. I have suffered great loss in my life….. from abandonment, critical spirits that try to take away my joyfulness in Christ, sufferings in mind body and spirit, bodily injuries and illness, separation in life long relationships, and so much more…. Yet…. In Christ I stand! Even, when I am unable to physically stand, I stand before a Holy God knowing that I trust in Him to give me strength to overcome, persevere, experience Joy, trust and faith.

I have always desired, even before accepting Christ and understanding what that meant, to be kind, forgiving, joyful, thankful and loving. At the same time, I have also been insecure within myself. Looking back I am wondering if my lack of confidence has stemmed from that insecurity. I have often looked back and wondered if before Christ my bewildering and empty heart was seeking security in others and things out of fear. Fear of others and their acceptance of me. Was I trying to fill that unexplained hole in my heart with worldly obligations and expectations? Doing, loving, and pursuing from a worldly perspective rather than out of a Godly perspective? Were my desires to be the person who was kind, forgiving, joyful, thankful and loving, simply put, an obligation of others for acceptance? Hmmm….

If I am being honest with myself I have to admit, yes. My longing to be accepted within all of my relationships before knowing Christ, stemmed out of a fear of mankind. I desired acceptance, love, forgiveness and joy to come from others. If I just did enough then they would accept me. Not saying that even in Christ my head hasn’t at times considered that same thought process, yet I do have to say that I have found more joy out of the most atrocious situations be it relationships, or health issues since I became a Christian. I have more often than not, clearly accepted that the hole in my heart and longing for acceptance will not, and never has been healed or filled by what I can obligingly do for others. My disappointments in others inability to accept and love me as well as Christ causes great sorrow and pain. Yet, through prayer and trust in Him I am consoled.

This morning I had the pleasure of once again joining my husband at his Faith and Fellowship breakfast breakout session at his company’s yearly Summer Development Conference. At that breakfast the theme was all about loving others. Do we love others out of obligation to do the right thing or do we love others based on the natural overflowing of love from our Lord Jesus Christ who loves us? Do we have a natural outflowing of His love which is then transferred unconditionally to others through our actions, words and behavior? What is the condition of our hearts? Are others changed by our natural love which is expressed because we are victorious in living for and serving Christ? How many of us can answer that question honestly?

We have a beloved rescue dog whom we purchased from a shelter at 6 weeks of age. Abandoned by her mother and cared for by humans, and adopted and loved by us. She is a Pyrenees mix which is known for herding and guarding. She does this well. She is well behaved unless she feels threatened or unless she is feeling the obligatory guarding she feels we need. Do we love her out of obligation? Even though at times she is a bit of a handful? No, we love her unconditionally and because our hearts are filled with love that we enjoy sharing with her. Isn’t that just like what it’s like with other people sometimes? A friend or family member who is difficult to love, when our hearts are filled and overflowing with the love of Christ, we take every opportunity to love them no matter what right? So why are so many people, friends and/or family members so willing to push away that kind of love? Why do they put an arms length between themselves and unconditional love by another? Why do they proclaim victory for themselves in pushing away pure agape love? Why does our rescue dog push back when we try to do what is best for her and love her point blank without expectations?

Appropriately and ironically this morning at this breakfast one of the speakers clearly pointed out it’s out of fear. Fear of abandonment themselves; fear of losing their identity in who they want to be; fear of disappointments; fear fear fear! Their hearts are not filled with the same overflowing love of Christ that can remove their fear. After all, how many people understand that in the Bible, God’s Word, there are 365 verses that are considered fear not verses. One for each day. One for each day that fear creeps into the mind of a believer. How many of us can say confidently that we are children of God, saved by Grace, redeemed and victorious through Jesus Christ? Notice the seventh word in that last sentence…. Confidently. Fear many times, takes over and overrides confidence. Fear of unknowns, fear of abandonment, fear of loneliness, fear of everything this world can throw upon the shoulders of even the most proclaimed Christian. Many people declare Christ, yet many do not truly believe Christ is stronger than their own will and fear. When we do not release our will and our fears completely to Him, His love cannot permeate and naturally overflow through us to others.

If we have a natural walk with God, others are changed by our expressed love for them. This is how we serve our redeemer. Sharing love naturally. Not always an easy task, and after my most recent 10 months of counseling (and many more before this….) I better understand that there are a great number of people that will allow their humanity and fear to overtake their hearts so that they are blinded by our natural overflowing, unconditional love for them. Humanity set’s regulations, conditions, rules and standards of how and when they will accept love, or show love. I have seen this in family, friends, social circles and even within God’s people. Unity in Christ has to be mutual for those who seek to serve Him. Unity in understanding that agape love is complete in itself. It’s pure, natural, unconditional, and without earthly regulations, conditions, rules and standards.

John 13:34. (ESV). A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.

So how is love expressed, experienced, given and understood when you are in Christ? Let’s take a look:

Galatians 5:22 – 26 (ESV). But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong in Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit.

There are so many verses on love and loving others. Friends, please lay your woes, concerns, natural envy of earthly desires at the feet of Christ and set before Him all fears. Be subject to the unwavering love of Christ by trusting in the leading of the Holy Spirit and allow the overflowing of Christs love permeate through you so that you can love just as Christ loves. Serve Christ by serving your brethren with their observance of your unconditional love for them and unwavering faith. Be aware of your own heart before criticizing or judging anyone else’s. Allow for the sanctification and growth in understanding the truth of what it means to be in Christ.

Oh how we need more and more companies to step up and allow Christ to be known and seen within their walls and within their employees. Unity and Love in Christ and Christ alone. Praise be to the Lord God for His leading of my heart to share what I am feeling this day. My heart is overflowing for all of you…..

Following in Faith, Why?

What Really Matters?

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For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing, to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance from life to life.  Who is sufficient for these things?  For we are not, like so many, peddlers of God’s word, but as men of sincerity, as commissioned by God, in the sight of God we speak in Christ.        2 Corinthians 2:15-17

Watching the news can be traumatizing these days.  It seems the world is falling apart and no one has control over anything.  There is conflict everywhere.  War overseas, tensions amongst Americans, divorce between parents, millennials not knowing when adulthood begins, sexual confusion tearing at the seams of the fabric of creation, growing numbers of cases of disease and outright moral conflict between right and wrong.  Where in the world do we find peace and hope?  Is there any?

If you haven’t noticed, I have been out of the loop lately.  My blogging has been a bit sparse.  I blame it on quite a number of things, from loss, to health, to not knowing what to say in times of constant turmoil.  I mean, what I want to say and what I should say are not in conjunction with one another and finding the right words were not coming as easily as they normally do.  That is however, until today.  Well, that’s only partially true…I started stirring with “blogger” thoughts last week, today is the first day I’ve had time to sit down and put them on the board.

A friend and I began doing a book study together.  Something that we both were excited to start for a few months.  We finally began and I have to say, I am thrilled.  Anything that can bring me closer to the Lord in study is a joy.  It gets me out of the “what is happening in this world” mentality, and takes me to the “thank you Lord for saving me out of this world” mentality.  Those little reminders to thank the Lord for life, grace, and eternal salvation bring a smile to my face, hope in my thoughts, stamina to continue on and keep me grounded in purpose.

And because lawlessness will be increased, the love of many will grow cold.  But the one who endures to the end will be saved. Matthew 24:12-13

I often wonder what people think of when they consider their lives.  I mean, do they look at their lives and thank the Lord for what they have and for their future?  Or do they look at their lives and say, “I’m just not rich enough, happy enough, or wise enough so I need to make changes… so look out world here I come.  I don’t care who is in my way or who I destroy in the  mean time.  After all, my life is my life and I need to be happy and have it all.”  Crazy as that may sound, in my eyes, that is what I see in people when I look around.  I see it in relationships, in groups, in family, on TV and in movies.  I have wept, prayed, prayed some more and at times come close to shutting down, wanting to turn off all social media, electronics and lock the door from the world.   Right or wrong, it saddens me that the world is so brutal to human emotion.  That being said, as I write this it’s noticed that what was just said has one considering “I” and “me”.  This life isn’t about “me”, it’s about something greater than that.

The sadness I have felt over these issues however, has been overshadowed with joy in the last few weeks.  Why?  Well, its due to the simple fact that I am reminded,

For by grace you have been saved through faith.   And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.  For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.   Ephesians 2:8-10

In our study  we are reading about our purpose in this life.  Why were we created to be saved?  The answers are always present and sometimes it takes the nudge of the Lord during these times of distress to remind us of His plan for us and how we should be living.  Remembering this, takes the “me” out of living.

Am I speaking about you?  Do you have the hope needed to continue on in this life?  Consider it.  Consider where you are.  Consider how you are living.  Consider what could be holy vs. worldly.

Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord, nor of me his prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel by the power of God, who saved us not because of our works but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began, and which now has been manifested through the appearing our Savior Christ Jesus, who abolished death and brought  life and immortality to light through the gospel…  2 Timothy 8-11

Does suffering for the gospel mean that we are unhappy?  No.  We don’t have the need for the fancy car, the perfect spouse, the perfect house, perfect job, perfect health, etc. etc.  Looking at the fact that God called his people out of a life of sin brings joy to believers, and a peace that nothing can compare to.  Just as I said above, we may get sad over the thought of the destruction of this world that was created so beautifully by God, yet we have joy knowing that there is so much more.

Prayerfully, my thoughts will continue to swell with blog worthy writing and a sweeping message of hope will be captured for others to embrace.   Have a blessed week/weekend and enjoy the sun this summer day.

Following in Faith

Seeking Life or Death ?

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Over the past year and a half, I’ve used my blog as a tool to express my thoughts, my recipes, my frustrations etc.  It was an avenue to express myself and to have communication with others when I otherwise felt alone and secluded.   I have met many other wonderful bloggers who have since become my friends.  Two of those delightful friends had recently inquired about my blogging as it seems I have nearly fallen off the “grid”.  My posts have become less in frequency and not quite  full of “heart”.  My excuse, if there is one,  is that I have been pondering a great amount lately.  Much of which I have chosen to keep unwaveringly close to the breast so to speak.  I have not felt inspired, nor have I felt that I had anything worth contributing.  That is until today….

Much of what has been on my mind has been about parenting, being a wife, a daughter and a friend and being a woman of God.  Am I doing a good job?  Am I standing up for what we as a Christian family believe in?  Am I acting as a worthy steward and servant that  gives glory to our Father?  Am I all that I need to be?  As I ponder all of these questions and consider how to put into words my thoughts, I glanced up at my husbands book shelf and see a book called Decisions, Decisions by Dave Swavely.  That’s it!  For the past few months I have been considering not all of the above, but “decisions”.    Decisions based on every area of my life and in every aspect of every relationship I have.  Decisions that always have an outcome and a consequence.  Decisions that affect everything and anyone in the path of their being made.  That being said, my mind swirled with inspiration and I feel like I have something to contribute.

I have always told my children two things, delivery will get you every time and make sure that whatever you do in life you are an upright moral human being serving God first and doing the best you can at whatever it is you do.  Doing that will ensure your success in a world that has become immune to insanity, adultery, murder, idol worship, acceptance, and sin.  Knowing what it says in 1 John 2:15-17  Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16 For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world. 17 And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.

As I look around at my own personal relationships, whether it be with my children, my spouse, my parents, friends and neighbors, I realize that even the smallest decision I make in those relationships can have an impact in the future.  That impact can either play out in a positive way or in a negative way.  It all depends upon how and I why I make certain decisions to begin with.  Was I making the decision based on self gratification?  Was I making the decision based on guilt?  Was I making a decision on resentment or out of anger?  Was I making a decision that was for someone else?  And finally, what was it that provoked a decision to be made and how did I come to that decision?  What avenue did I seek out in making that decision?  Did I consult with others?  Did I have a knee jerk reaction and make a decision based on an incident without knowing all the facts?  Did I take it to the One that called me out of this world to serve?  Did I pray about it and seek out His counsel?  So many things to consider when making a decision.  I wonder how many people actually consider their decision making and the outcomes that may follow based on their reasoning for their decisions.

For me, I ponder my own decisions in this life and to a  fault I have also pondered decisions that others have made for the themselves.  That is what troubles my inner being and something that I am delighted to report I have been praying over.  Decisions that seem so small can have a large impact in the end, with some very disturbing consequences.   As I began reading the aforementioned  book above, the author wrote If you are a believer in Christ, the resulting effects in your life should not be your only motivation, or even your primary one, to make good decisions.  Taking 2 Corinthians 5:6-10 into account about the judgment that holds us accountable in decisions we make.  So we are always of good courage. We know that while we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord, 7 for we walk by faith, not by sight. 8 Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord. 9 So whether we are at home or away, we make it our aim to please him. 10 For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.  The apostle Paul does not only speak to the Corinthians, he speaks also to us.  He reminds us that our salvation came at a price and that although we are saved by grace, we are also judged according to our behavior and the decisions we make.  A consideration that worldly viewpoints overlook.  Although, we as Christians understand that God has not revealed His truth to those who are held captive to their blindness.  To no fault of their own, their decisions that are decapitating to self are inevitable.

What about a Christian who claims himself saved and is trying to follow God?  Sometimes it is the shame of our churches and leadership that they are not guiding their flocks in the truth of the gospel.  With all of the “extras” to get numbers in the door, they fail to teach the word as it is written.  Adding in man made “traditions” and “additions” to aspire to others that “Christ loves everyone”.   I have been one of those Christians.  I have walked in those shoes.  I have through the grace of God been pulled out of heresy and been shown that only God’s Word stands true.  The Bible is more than just a book to read on Sunday, it is the creators instruction book to an everlasting life.  Not to be changed to suit a sermon, nor added to or taken away to fulfill numbers.  It is a way of life that needs to be taken seriously.

It is with great hope and prayer that  if you have chosen to read to the end, that you will consider, as I have,  all of the decisions you make in your life.  That you will consider prayer first, asking God for guidance and trusting in Him to have a better plan than the one you may think you need.  Keeping with the Spirit, seeking out what scripture says on the matter and realizing the truth behind decision making.  Asking the why and taking into consideration how.

Following in Faith, Lymes, Why?

Reflection and Progression

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Picture taken from Omnibus III
Picture taken from Omnibus III

Romans 8:25
But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience. 

Sitting in a chair facing my friend, who sits reclined back comfortably in her recliner we discuss our new book and what a wonderful author John Bunyan is.  His incredible allegory of the walk of a Christian in Pilgrims Progress. We usually meet once a week at her home (she is completely home bound and unable to do anything for herself anymore) and read a chapter or two of a book.  This week, we began a new book and because we both were enjoying it so much, decided to throw in a second day.  Our visits over the last 6 months have been pretty much the same, we visit first, her husband sweetly confirms she is comfortable and as he exits to his “man cave” office, she and I share a little more of our week and I begin to read.

As we began our new book, we were thrown a curve ball.  I began reading and when I finished page 16, I began reading what I thought was page 17 only to realize that the story didn’t make any sense at all.  I looked up to see that the page after 16 was actually page 23. Now, keep in mind that I cannot read on my own without having to read one page several times due to my Lymes and my friend cannot read at all and depending upon the day may have issues with processing information due to her corticobasil degeneration.  That being said, you can just imagine my dismay to find that in a neatly hardbound book there were no pages ripped out and yet pages 17-22 were missing.  We both sat there laughing not quite sure what to do.  We quickly realized that our time together that day may be cut short by a error in the binding of the book.

Upon further investigation, I found the rest of the pages… 10 pages further into the book.  So, as if it isn’t funny enough that we are reading Pilgrims Progress together, both of us having cognitive issues and both of us being more tired in the afternoon, I now was challenged with reading from right to left rather than left to right and my friend had to endure me stopping at critical parts of the story just to find my place.  Honestly, I kept thinking it would have made for a great home video recording.

Well, as it is with my memory these days, I completely forgot this when I went over to read to her the second day.  So of course, I began reading where I left off and of course ended up reading some of what we had already read earlier in the week amongst the new pages of the story.  Once again, we had to laugh and I had to regroup and figure out where my next pages were.  Were they 10 pages forward or 2 pages back.

Having Lyme makes life so interesting!  Seriously, I can relate to the frustration that was felt in the movie Still Alice… I am physically so much better than last year that I am not complaining at all.  Last year at this time I could not walk up a flight of steps without nearly passing out and I could not do anything for myself except maybe a shower, and that was not daily as I just didn’t have the energy for it.  I was in constant pain, my exhaustion was unexplainable and my energy level was at best good for only about an hour.  By mid afternoon my brain was so foggy that I could not process information, I was unable to drive as I forgot where I was going and when I drove I completely blanked out and couldn’t remember I had driven at all.  To go anywhere that needed walking I had to use a wheelchair.

After 10 months I had serious doubts I’d recover from this illness. You can imagine my my excitement when I found the doctor and protocol I had been looking for since being first diagnosed.  So in early May, my Integrative doctor agreed to let me try the protocol of the other doctor I found and by June I was going to the Highland games with the family and the wheelchair stayed in the garage.  I’m not saying it didn’t need to be brought out from time to time, but overall I was seeing improvements.  By July I was able to make an 8 hour drive to our cottage alone with my daughter and by September I was driving to CA with the kids.  The pain subsided within that first month and slowly my energy level began to increase.  The brain fog has also improved, unless of course I am extremely tired and have not slept well.  Learning my limitations, keeping track of my symptoms and making adjustments with my meds has been such a help.  Having two doctors who look beyond, listen to me with all ears and keep an open mind to the research I also do has been a blessing.

Your likely wondering why I went from reading Pilgrims Progress to my health.  Well, as we read on Thursday, I couldn’t help but to think about the characters in the story, what they stood for and how even though the book was first published in 1678, the allegory is so powerful for us today.  No wonder it is the second most widely published book in world to this day, second only to the Bible.  Although I enjoyed the book a few years ago when the kids and I read it together and studied it, I think after the last year I am enjoying it even more.

On Thursday we read about Christian meeting the Interpreter and what he finds in the Palace prior to going any further on his journey.  Within the Palace there are a number of rooms.  One of the rooms was rather small and introduced were two children, Passion and Patience.  The characteristics of the two were such:

Passion was seen as being discontent; wanting of all things now, and at that moment Patience was quiet; willing to wait for that which is yet to come

In the story, the Interpreter explains:   “These two lads are Figures; Passion of the men of this World, and Patience of the men of That which is to come:  For as here thou seest, Passion will have all now, this year; that is to say, in this world;  so are the men of this world:  they must have all their good things now, they cannot stay till next year, that is, until the next World, for their portion of good.  That proverb, A Bird in the Hand is worth two in the Bush, is of more authority with them, than are all the Divine testimonies of the Good of the World to come.  But as thou sawest, that he had quickly lavished all away, and had presently left him nothing but rags; so will it be with all such men at the End of this world.  

Christian replies:  Now I see that Patience has the best Wisdom, and that upon many accounts.  1.  Because he stays  for the best things.  2.  And also because he will have the Glory of his, when the other has nothing but rags.

Interpreter:  Nay, you may add another, to wit, the Glory of the next World will never wear out; but these are suddenly gone.  Therefore Passion had not so much reason to laugh at Patience, because he had his good things first, as Patience will have to laugh at Passion, because he had his best things last; for first must give place to last, because last must have its time to come; but last gives place to nothing; for there is not another to succeed:  He therefore that hath his portion first, must needs have a Time to spend it; but he that has his portion last, must have it lastingly:  Therefore it is said of Dives, In thy Lifetime thou receivedst thy good things, and likewise Lazarus evil things; but now he is comforted, and thou are tormented.

Christian:  Then I perceive it is not best to covet things that are now, but to wait for things to come.  

And in conclusion, I want to end with the beginning of what Interpreter has to say next:  “You say truth:  For the things that are seen are Temporal; but the things that are not seen are Eternal:  

I have to admit that last year when I was diagnosed, I wanted my body to heal and for my life to go back as it used to be.  I wanted to go back to being the super mom who could get up in the morning, make breakfast, school the kids, drive them around town for their activities, pull weeds out of the garden, help my friends paint their houses, stop for groceries and spend long hours in the kitchen preparing dinners for my family, all in one day.  I wanted to be able to plan out events for the homeschool community or prepare classes as I once had in our co-op classes.  I wanted to be organized without losing things.  I wanted healing at that moment.  I tried to be patient, and I even prayed that the Lord use my illness for His good will.  Yet internally, my mind wanted desperately to have my life back.

In reading the above exchange between Christian and Interpreter, I was seeing myself as being like that of Passion.  Although my heart longs to be more like Patience, I know that my human nature as a sinner is more like that of Passion.  As the months drew on and  now another year, I am learning more and more the importance of the lessons of Patience.  The story has resonated in my mind ever since our reading on Thursday and I know it’s through the Providence of God that He continues to teach this weary being of lessons He needs for me to learn, sanctifying me so that perfection may still yet be seen.

If I had received the blessing of quick healing, would I have followed the leading of my heart to go see my friend who was already home bound?  Would I have understood what it was like for those who have no or limited social interaction with others?  Would I be reading Pilgrims Progress with a friend who needs to be reminded of the eternal blessings yet to come?  Would I have understood that I truly had sisters that took time out of their days to help me cope in my own loneliness?

Honestly, I think not.  If God had allowed me to follow my own way, just as Passion, then I am quite certain my short lived illness would have been placed in a box on a shelf where dust would settle only to be forgotten.  I would have gone on with my days wanting to be something more and someone more than I am meant to be.  I would have likely filled my days with things that have no real meaning other than for self.  My friend would still be sitting in her recliner, yet I would have missed the blessings of seeing her smile, her sense of humor with her husband and our wonderful discussions that come out of our readings.  I would have missed an opportunity to serve another who was and is desperate for her own healing and for understanding as to why her life has taken the turn it has.

As I continue to read through Pilgrims Progress I look forward to seeing what the Lord once again has to show me.  I hope that as you read this post, you too may consider reading along with us.  I promise, you will not be disappointed.

Luke 8:15
As for that in the good soil, they are those who, hearing the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with patience.

 

Following in Faith

Abiding in His Love

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But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. 2Corinthians 4:7-11

I’ve written it before, and I think it needs to be the reminder in our home right now.  Praise God for the glory of His word to teach us, build our character, shape us, and connect us to Him.

For the love of God is eternal, unconditional, just and perfect!  May we always remember, live by, abide by and stand firm in His word.

Following in Faith

A Little Perspective

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Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.   2Corinthians 1:3-4

In studying JOB, I have come to understand more clearly the value of trusting God, His Word, and His mercies that are offered to His flock.  Calling out to him over the last year, whether my day was filled with pain or exhaustion, I admittedly had moments where I complained over my circumstances, yet I also knew and had faith that God had a plan.  I was comforted in knowing that He would utilize my situation to His glory and that nothing I go through in this world is too great when I have Him by my side.

I have a picture with a beautiful poem about the Lord carrying us in our times of trouble and the picture has one set of footprints walking in the sand.  Although I enjoy the concept of Him carrying us through this life, I think I would rather consider Him as a partner walking beside me like a seeing eye “friend”.  Pointing out obstacles, directing my footsteps, guiding me down the path of life leading to His narrow gate.  Nurturing me along the journey so that in the end He will be glorified.

One of our questions in our study asked whether we have ever encountered God in a way that transformed our understanding of or attitude toward Him?  We were then asked to share the experience and tell how our view of God was changed.

My answer was yes and I went on to explain.  Our move to our current location was not an easy transition.  We moved to a state that we had never stepped into, knowing absolutely no one, and to top it off it was in the winter.  We lived in a two bedroom apartment for two months while we sought out our current home.  The kids had school and were making friends, my husband had work and new relationships to nurture while I had a realtor once a week.  My days were very lonely.

I had left behind a volunteer position at the kids school that kept me working every day as the school librarian, room mom for one class, a bible study that I had been a part of for 10 years, childhood friends, college friends, family and ladies that I had befriended after our third move.  My involvement with our church included VBS, women’s ministry, fundraisers and the meal delivery service for our brothers and sisters within the church that I was in charge of.   I  was running with kids to Karate classes two days a week, baseball three days a week, dance classes 3 days a week, boy scouts  and brownies every other week and our weekends were spent at a cottage.   To say that I was busy is an understatement.  In fact, one of my friends gave me a mug for my birthday that said, “Note to self:  Stop volunteering for stuff”.

In my loneliness, I found that going to the Lord was giving me encouragement.  In my times of human weakness, however, I sought out to find purpose for myself in our new town.  I thought I needed to be a part of something, other than just looking for a house for the family.  So after a month of spending one day a week cleaning the apartment, grocery shopping and doing laundry, another day going out with the realtor, and the rest of my week spent sitting alone reading the word of God, I went in to our new church and requested a list of activities and groups that our family could be a part of.  I distinctly remember breaking down in tears in front of the secretaries.  Not sure what else to do, they presented me with a list of people to call and activities that may interest us.

One by one we reached out, seeking out purpose, more for myself than the rest of the family.  After all, they were meeting people and making friends.  I was the one who was trying to find my niche.  Each time we reached out, we hit a dead end.  Either the groups were full or after receiving information we decided that the group was not what we were interested in.  Once again, I remember finding myself in tears.  As our second month approached, we had found our house and we were waiting for it to be completed as it had been a new construction.  One more day would be added to my loneliness as I no longer had my day with the realtor.  Another moment of tears.  I remember asking God why and I also remember complaining.

One day, as I was reading His word, I was struck by the time I had to be with Him.  I’m not sure exactly what took place, however, I felt this peace that I had not known since our move.  I came to the realization that prior to our move, my time with Lord was when I could fit Him in, between projects and activities.   I scheduled my time with Him based on what worked for me.  In the two months of being in the apartment I realized that all I had was time to spend with Him.  He had become my best friend, my caretaker, and my encourager.  He was walking beside me and was giving me comfort in my times of loneliness.  I was not alone, I just didn’t have perspective.

I remember thanking Him for all that He was doing for me and my family.  For giving us all that we needed.  Even though we were in a two bedroom apartment and ate dinners at a table in the living room by the couch.  We all have said that they were the best two months we’ve ever had as a family.   As a family, we grew closer, enjoying our time together since we didn’t have any extra curricular activities vying for our time.

I would say that during that time I encountered God as I had not known him before.  The focus in my years prior to our move were spent trying to do all the good in the world, doing all that I could for my family and for others.  I spent time with him when He fit into my schedule, praying while I was driving and in my quiet time upon waking and before bed.   After our move, I had refocused my attention, turning my daily schedule into a time of continued worship of Him.  To my pleasant surprise, my Heavenly Father was there waiting for me and He met with me giving me peace, understanding and perspective.  He didn’t ask me to wait until He had time in His schedule, He was ready and willing to offer mercy, grace, and love when I needed it the most.

Rather than seeing Him as a Holy God who was too busy to notice whether or not I took time out for Him, I realized He was a Holy God who is a jealous God that needed me to take that next step in knowing Him.  I was transformed!  I don’t mean that I became a christian at that point, I knew I was a christian and had been for many years.  I was however, growing in my knowledge of Him and who He truly was.  Humbled by His time with me and my recognition of His Almighty character, I prayed that He would lead me and open doors when He was ready for me to once again serve outside of the home.  I said that prayer in church one night and at the end of the service a woman approached me asking me to be a part of a prayer group.  Timing was everything.  Once again, I thanked Him, knowing that all He wanted me to trust in Him and His plan for my life.   Each experience I have endured since the Lord called me by name has helped me to grow closer to Him and has given me new perspective.

In watching Bethany Hamilton in Soul Surfer recently with my daughter, I am reminded that sometimes we need to be in a different place, focusing on something other than ourselves to gain perspective.  Not unlike what God did with JOB.  JOB had his own thoughts and considerations in defending himself pridefully with his friends, yet it took God’s audience with JOB to show him a new perspective that included who he was in comparison to who God was.   Isn’t that so like the life of a christian?  When we stray from the herd, our shepherd uses His staff to to gently remind us of our place in the flock.

I challenge you reader to look at your current affliction and look for opportunities to give you a new perspective.  Preferably, allowing God to be a part of that process.

But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us.  We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair;  persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies.  For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh.  2Corinthians 4:7-11

 

Following in Faith, Why?

Waking up to Snow

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Snow is here.
Snow is here.

The Compassion of the Lord – Isaiah 55

55 “Come, everyone who thirsts,
come to the waters;
and he who has no money,
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without price.
2 Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread,
and your labor for that which does not satisfy?
Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good,
and delight yourselves in rich food.
3 Incline your ear, and come to me;
hear, that your soul may live;
hand I will make with you an everlasting covenant,
my steadfast, sure love for David.
4 Behold, I made him a witness to the peoples,
a leader and commander for the peoples.
5 Behold, you shall call a nation that you do not know,
and a nation that did not know you shall run to you,
because of the Lord your God, and of the Holy One of Israel,
for he has glorified you.
6 “Seek the Lord while he may be found;
call upon him while he is near;
7 let the wicked forsake his way,
and the unrighteous man his thoughts;
let him return to the Lord, that he may have compassion on him,
and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.
8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
10 “For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven
and do not return there but water the earth,
making it bring forth and sprout,
giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater,
11 so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth;
it shall not return to me empty,
but sit shall accomplish that which I purpose,
and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.
12 “For you shall go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and the hills before you
shall break forth into singing,
and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.
13 Instead of the thorn shall come up the cypress;
instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle;
and it shall make a name for the Lord,
an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off.”

Following in Faith

Joy Through Affliction

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Can I somehow relay to anyone through my words how much rejoicing has been going on in my heart the last few months and especially yesterday?  I mean, even though my Lyme symptoms have returned, my joy in Him has not subsided.

Psalm 4:7   You have put more joy in my heart than they have when their grain and wine abound.

Psalm 71:23  My lips will shout for joy, when I sing praises to you; my soul also, which you have redeemed.

My husband and I have been married for 21 years next month.  During that time we have had many trials, heart aches, and afflictions overwhelm our relationship.  Through every timely attack, we have managed to cling to one another.  Oh, it’s not always been easy, and for the first 12 years it was especially tough in our home.  I remember my early walk with the Lord, knowing and understanding fully who He was, as being a lonely venture.  Lonely in that God’s timing for my husband was not in sync with His timing with me.  I prayed for those twelve years that God would change my husbands heart, that He would show my husband His Word and Grace so that we could grow together.  At times, God likely heard my prayers to be more like begging.  Pleading for the release of my husbands hardened heart so that he would hear God’s calling and crave to know the truth as I was learning it.  Let’s just clearly say, it was a long 12 years and the support from others to continue on was at times quite at odds with scripture and felt more like worldly advice  attacks.

At the bible study I attended weekly during that time, an older, wiser Titus 2 woman who was in our leaders group reminded all of us through a devotional that sometimes we need to release our wants and desires and give it up to the Lord, for as we know all things are in His timing.  That our will was not always His will and that we needed to trust Him.

Wow!  Wait… hold the presses… I knew that!  Yet my daily prayer for 12 consistent years had been pleading my will upon the Lord’s heartstrings.  I was begging for something rather than trusting and praying for God’s will to be done in my husbands life.  Why had I not asked God for my own patience?  Why had I not prayed for acceptance of where God had my husband at that time?  I remember beating myself up about my own prayers and how selfish they were.  I wasn’t trusting God to just do as He needed.  It was that day that I went home and got on my knees and asked for God’s forgiveness in not trusting Him.  I repented for my lack of patience and asked God to give me strength to wait upon Him and His timing for my husband…. If that is what the Lord intended.  I did not know if my husband would ever accept Christ nor if God would ever even call upon my husband to be one of His flock.  I just knew that I needed to trust the plan God had for us and to stay true to Him and all that He is.

Two weeks from the day of that prayer, my husband was asked by a personal friend who he respected, if he wanted to begin a bible study with him.  My husband accepted the invitation.  We went to the store and bought him a study bible and he began studying God’s word.  I kid you not, I stood in amazement.  I have to say that for a period of time, God allowed my husband to continue serving the prince of the earth while also learning about God’s truth.  There was a true battle of good vs. evil at work.  At the final turning point,  the crushing lowest point of my husbands life, he began to see that he could not be of both worlds and the Lord began to strengthen my husbands desire for truth and soften his once hardened heart.  He admittedly prayed about hypocracy and that he no longer wanted the sinful part of his life.  He asked God for help in getting rid of the sins and continued temptations that were trying to overtake him.

John 3:5-8  Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God.  That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is born of the spirit.  Do not marvel that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’  The wind blows where it wishes, and you hear its sound, but you do not know where it comes from or where it goes.  So it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit.”

God did not turn a blind eye.  He helped my husband see the errors of his ways, and gave him the nourishment of truth that he so desired.  The ever present Holy Spirit walked with him giving him an unknown desire for learning the scriptures.  As time went forth, the fruit of God’s work in his life was being seen and his life was reflective of a life being lived out to serve our heavenly creator.

John 15:1-11  “I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser.  Every branch in me that  does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.  Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you.  Abide in me and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you,  unless you abide in me.  I am the vine; you are the branches.  Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.  If anyone does not abide in me he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned.  If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.  By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples.  As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you.  Abide in my love.  If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love.  These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.

All of those years since, I and others have seen a complete transformation.  Out of darkness came a blessing of light that has touched the lives of so many.   He has over that last 9 years, become the man I prayed for him to become.  He may live in this world yet he too is not of this world.  He was called, he heard, he acted.  He has not taken the gospel for granted.  He studies, he craves the word, and he longs for truth.  All in God’s timing!

John 15:16-17   You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you.  These things I command you, so that you will love one another. 

Romans 12:2  Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed  by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

You may ask what in the world this has to do with my joy.  Well, yesterday my beloved husband was blessed with the induction of becoming a deacon in our church.  This is not a role to be taken lightly.  For many months our family in Christ has been praying over those being called into this position, and we have been praying that “God’s Will Be Done”.

1 Timothy 3:8-13  Deacons likewise must be dignified, not double-tongued, not addicted to much wine, not greedy for dishonest gain.  They must hold the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience.  And let them also be tested first; then let them serve as deacons if they prove themselves blameless.  Their wives must be dignified, not slanderers, but sober-minded, faithful in all things.  Let deacons each be the husband of one wife, managing their children and their  own households well.  For those who serve well as deacons gain a good standing for themselves and also great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus.  

I was asked by several people yesterday how I felt to be a deacons wife.  Honestly, I am not sure I should feel any different.  After all, my husband has been called to a role he is meant to serve in, and I am gladly sitting by supporting him, just as I have been supporting him our entire 21 years of marriage.

Romans 12:3  For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself  more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgement, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.  

If I have to admit to any feeling, it would be joy.  Joy over the transformation  that has carried my husband out of death and into Life.

John 20:30-31  Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of the disciples, which are not written in this book; but these are written so that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name.

Romans 6:23  For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God, is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

I am not overly joyful about titles, yet I am overjoyed at the knowledge I have of where we have been and where we are today.  I am also overjoyed at knowing that God’s timing is perfect, in every way and that my husbands serving heart embraces God’s will.

Romans 14:16-18    So do not let what you regard as good to be spoken of as evil.  For the kingdom of God  is not a matter of eating and drinking but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.  Whoever thus serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved  by men.

Since I know he reads my blogs, I want to add one more thing:

Honey, I love you and am pleased to be on this journey with you.  Together,  we can support one another through all that comes our way with the strength of  Jesus Christ.  I love you!

I know that I am not alone in saying congratulations.  🙂  

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Jim would be proud that you have been a willing servant for He who rescued you out of death to give you Life and that you continue to trust in His will over all that comes your way.  I knew when I saw you helping Jim with his final walk toward everlasting peace with the Lord, that your were meant to serve your fellow brothers and sisters in Christ.  With this last year being so tough, you never wavered taking care of me.  

Thank you My Love, and yes, I am pleased to say I am a deacons wife!   

 

 

Following in Faith

Past vs. Present

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I admit it, I’m a bible thumper.  I enjoy being in church and when we travel I miss fellowship with those who are dear to my heart, my church family.  I enjoy learning about the history of the gospel, the truth of God’s Word and the approach of which we should all be living out our lives if we are truly sheep of His flock.  I am continually held accountable through conviction of my own sins and am blessed by the knowledge that I will never be perfected in Christ until my redemption through death.

I remember the day I sought out His will for my life and that of my unborn child.  The day I wept in prayer seeking forgiveness for a life spent looking for happiness and “fun”.  Oh, it has been a journey and sanctification can be long and sometimes difficult.  Attending a world wide bible study with over 17 denominations, yes there are many, I learned about reading the bible and how to study scripture.  I learned about how to be a wife and a mother as God intends, a friend, a servant and a daughter to an almighty sovereign Father.  I learned about forgiveness and the blessings that follow and learned about the toll bitterness can take on one who does not seek it.   I have been encouraged in times of trouble, I have been comforted in times of darkness, and I have listened hearing words spoken that I had not before understood.  I remember feeling as Saul must have felt when the scales were removed from his eyes and he became a servant.  I felt as if I had been blind and was finally seeing colors and shapes as they had never been seen.  Things have over the years become clearer and the journey has not been easy.  Taking me from being a nominal christian in the worship of several different denominational churches where my stirring heart to hear truth in a way I could not explain was not satisfied, to the community of which I call home.  A community of like minded believers that see things as I see them.  Where truth comes from God’s most holy word, through teaching that is scripturally sound and thoroughly studied.  Christ has led this sinful mind, body and soul to a place of humbling grace surrounded with unconditional love and forgiveness.  I praise God that I have been led out of darkness and into the light.  I praise Him for His continued watchful eye over my family, grabbing hold the hearts of my husband and children so that generations will share in His kingdoms glory, serving Him together for an eternity.

As we sat in church this morning, I once again felt that society needs to hear truth.   Truth spoken from a pulpit that does not focus on “bringing in the numbers” by pleasing the people, yet a pulpit that seeks to honor the Father on His day with truth from His own book.  Do people really understand why we have the family platform we have?  Do they understand that it was not a man made concept that just took off in tradition?  How many people understand that the bible is the most widely read book in the world?  What is taught on Sundays and any other day of the week for God’s faithful should not just be left at the door step of the building as they leave, it should be carried through out their week and taken seriously.  Hell is real.  Heaven is real!  (And no, I do not watch movies that try to tell me it is, I know it because I read it in God’s spoken word in the scriptures and I feel it in my heart.)  We live in a corrupt world of deception that tries to destroy families and what they stand for.  We as believers in truth and followers of Christ need to stand up for what we believe in and teach our children to be strong in their faith, protecting the Word as God would have us.  He will overcome!

Therefore, I am posting today’s message spoken from the pulpit.  This is a subject dear to my heart as I teach my children about marriage, expectations in relationships and the honor and glory commitment is to our almighty sovereign God.  To Him be the glory!

I pray that you are blessed by the message and that you will be given the ears to hear it as God intends.  If you are a sinner seeking forgiveness, I pray that this gives you hope.  If you are a parent, I pray that it gives you a clearer vision into the scriptures to teach your children.

Please read these first and then listen to the audio.   (If you do not own a bible, please google the verses in ESV.)

Psalm 30:2-3,  Proverbs 5:1-14,  Ephesians 5:22-33 and Exodus 20:14

http://crbc.us/media_events/976-The-Seventh-Commandment

(Courtesy of CRBC.us, and with permission to post.)

 

Lymes

Trembling and Falling Down Before Him

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Luke 8:40-48

40 Now when Jesus returned, the crowd welcomed him, for they were all waiting for him. 41 And there came a man named Jairus, who was a ruler of the synagogue. And falling at Jesus’ feet, he implored him to come to his house, 42 for he had an only daughter, about twelve years of age, and she was dying. As Jesus went, the people pressed around him. 43 And there was a woman who had had a discharge of blood for twelve years, and though she had spent all her living on physicians, she could not be healed by anyone. 44 She came up behind him and touched the fringe of his garment, and immediately her discharge of blood ceased. 45 And Jesus said, “Who was it that touched me?” When all denied it, Peter said, “Master, the crowds surround you and are pressing in on you!” 46 But Jesus said, “Someone touched me, for I perceive that power has gone out from me.” 47 And when the woman saw that she was not hidden, she came trembling, and falling down before him declared in the presence of all the people why she had touched him, and how she had been immediately healed. 48 And he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace.”

Seeking out physicians to find the cure.  I can relate.  Falling down before him.  I can relate.  Healing by the touch of the Lord Jesus Christ.  I can relate.  To have faith and go in peace.  I can relate.

Psalm 91:1-6

1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. 2 I will say to the LORD, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” 3 For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence. 4 He will cover you with his pinions, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness is a shield and buckler. 5 You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day, 6 nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness, nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.

Dwelling in the shelter of the Lord.  I can relate.  Crying out “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”  I can relate.  Finding refuge under his wings.  I can relate.  Not fearing the terror of the night nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.  I can relate.

Through the grace of the Lord I will be healed.  Through the strength of he who carries me, I rest in peace.  Through the words of truth, I find wisdom.  Through prayers of thanksgiving I find hope.

Friends, I pray that you find healing today and in those yet to come.  I pray that you find peace in the Lord and in knowing that through Him all things are possible.

Have a great week!