Educating myself as well as my children has been something I have enjoyed since I began my journey of living a healthy lifestyle. Anything I did with my children when they were little was an adventure into the “why” zone. With the information now present on the internet it’s even more fun and sometimes can be a bit daunting. Whenever the kids ask me a question about something I’m completely unsure about, we research it and look for answers.
With my diagnosis of Lymes, and recent finding of several co-infections, I am finding my days filled with trying to answer the why question. Why does it hurt so badly? Why do I feel good for a few hours and then all of a sudden I feel like I’m on deaths door? Why can’t I stand longer than 20 minutes without feeling 3+ hours of pain in my feet and body when I finally sit down? Why does my right foot not want to bend, feels numb and just doesn’t work well 90% of the time? Why do I all of a sudden have severe shooting pains that come and go throughout different parts of my body that leave me disabled until it passes? Why do I think of things I want to say but the words don’t always come out or I forget 10 seconds after I thought it? Why is there no known cure for Lymes? Why do I also have multiple co-infections? Why me when so many others don’t care about what they do to their bodies, what they eat or drink or inhale? Why? Why? Why?
The list of my questions is long and unending. The more I learn the more I ask why. Most people could look at me (some have) and say, “Just take the antibiotics, find a project, rest and wait to feel better. Let the doctor’s tell you what to do and let them take charge of your health. After all, they are educated to know the answers. Why do you care to know about it? It would just freak me out, your better off not knowing.” Key statements that make me want to run to the Library of Congress, set up camp and stay until I’ve read every published study, report, article, and book written on Lymes and their wonderful debilitating co-infections. Don’t get me wrong, I am by no means anti-doctor nor anti-antibiotics. If I thought for one second that an antibiotic would heal me and actually get rid of the little buggers destroying my body I would take them. In fact, that may be part of my future protocol. For now however, I’ve done enough research, as has my doctor, to know that at this time my personal journey is difficult and weary and that my body needs more than heavy duty short term, expensive antibiotics.
When if comes to learning about the disease and it’s counterparts, I care because I am blessed to have a body that for 44 years worked well and supported me. It’s my God given, God designed body that I need to take care of. The more I know about this disease, the better off I will be to ask intelligent thought provoking questions that will help myself heal. Besides, whoever said that you needed to stop reading and learning just because you have a degree. I am an educated woman who feels that learning goes beyond the classroom door and actually begins with life skills. We teach our children memorization of dates, places, equations and names of important people, yet have we taught them to be proactive and free thinkers? Have we taught them to ask questions or to just listen to what we want them to know? Have we taught them or are we teaching them how to research everything and to be open to understanding the answers to why? If my children do not retain anything else in their school journey, they will remember that in order to help yourself in anything in life, you need to be completely informed. You need to research everything and don’t trust someone else to do it for you.
I have been asked over and over again about my illness, how I’m doing, why am I not on antibiotics yet, what is the diagnosis, how long before I feel better, etc. etc. Then, inevitably, if they are not like me and have the “doctors know all attitude”, they roll their eyes or get quiet and give me the bodily signs that they feel I’ve made every wrong decision in helping myself.
Little do they know, I have been going in to my doctors or health care professionals with questions or information that help us work together in my healing. I have the respect of my health care professionals and doctors because I care about my over all long term healing and am not just looking for the quick fix pill or idea that may help for the interim. Little do my critics know that while I sit day after day quietly waiting to feel “normal”, I spend countless hours researching every website I can find on Lymes. From Western traditional medicine to Integrative to Holistic. Oh, there are some very “quacky” ideas out there, and there are some very sad stories and videos that have scared me to tears. One even kept me up all night.
As I said before, I’m a college educated woman who does not easily fall prey to the latest and greatest. In fact, I am very aware of the effects of untreated Lymes and of the dangerous co-infections and my very low adrenals. For these reasons, I am being treated with protocols that are attacking the problems individually in hopes of long term healing. The disease may not be curable, however, the symptoms can be controlled. I love to research and will keep on researching until my journey comes to an end with this devastating disease. I look forward to sharing with you in the near future what I have learned and hope that you will find my sharing to be an inspiration for you to keep on learning.
